We Shoot Ourselves in the Foot [Teaching Thoughts]
We Shoot Ourselves in the Foot [Teaching & Thoughts]
Ex. of How to Shoot Oneself in the Foot
Every single year we teachers in the upper grade levels do one thing that is the unofficial equivalent of throwing in the white towel. Take a guess….Realizing that you did not leave enough time to finish that last novel, and realizing that you’re going to have to force feed all the appropriate themes, plots, and vocabulary for one final test that will let Eduardo R, or Tysha J. know whether they should even both showing up for the final exam? Not what I’m looking for, but it happens to all of us. Take another shot….What do all upper level teachers do that is the unofficial equivalent to a playing of the extended version of the Fat Lady’s swan song? Hint…Science/Math teachers, it’s not switching into full on test prep mode? That usually signifies that any minute in the hallways, some down on their grade student is going to ask you to reteach the quadratic equation.
No, the unofficial end to the year is that day when we reward the good kids for being good kids all year. They get to go to Six Flags, Canada’s Wonderland, or some other various accident waiting to happen trip as a sign of our gratitude that they did not shoot at, stab, or curse you out during the school year, all the while maintaining a decent grade point average, and normal human composure. This trip also has the debatable intentional or unintentional effect of saying to the kids not going “Better Luck, next year! (Fuckwad)” as the bus to a great escape leaves them in stranded to a muggy day of educational instruction.
Handsome Reward.
So you see- This is how we stab ourselves in the foot. We tell our “good kids” have fun but “not too much fun.” No matter what, hijinx (Hijinx, I exclaim) will ensue. For example, there’s always going to be a few kids who manifest their inner bad ass for a few hours out in public. Or the girl who loses her wallet, and her ID. There might even be a hint of a stolen cellphone, or lunch. While the trip is fun for the kids, it’s definitely more of a Great Adventure for the adults.
Conversely, imagine coming into work wearing your professional dress and passing by your colleagues in shorts and t-shirts, all with grins just as wide on their faces as the day to come is long on yours. When taking attendance you realize that all of the children you mildly enjoy, the ones that you look out into the classroom, and make eye contact with to remind yourself that there is at least one kid listening, and possibly even sympathetic to your plight. The kids who come to school come in expecting it to be a blow off day, and it’s true. In theory, you could forge on with important review work, but really, all that does is make you want to hit your head against your desk because all of your Aces in the holes are gone. The day in so many ways is bullshit, pure and unfiltered.
Ye Olde New York City Publick Schoole
To this I say (and mostly because I am no longer of school age….) let’s schedule these trips after exams. Or maybe on a weekend day so that a day of instruction and/or review isn’t lost. In such a way, we can all then share the unfortunate blaring discomfort of a poorly planned school without ventilation.
